Somehow some evil being had failed
I heard that some religious right thinks that homosexuality is caused by the devil or that they’re being possessed. I would like to put up a little something for you.
Satan: Mwuahahahahaha, I’m Satan, and I’m going to ruin mankind with my awesome, evil, wicked plan.
Demon: Master, master, what evil plan are you going to do?
Satan: I’m going to turn people gay!
Demon: Ooh, how evil…. What’s a gay?
Satan: Well, it has different meanings. One, it means happy.
Demon: You’re gonna make people happy?
Satan: Well no, another meaning is attraction to the same sex. I’m going to make men attracted to men and women attracted to women.
Demon: What purpose would that serve your wickedness?
Satan: They will not be able to procreate and humanity will fall to extinction! Mwuahahahahahahaha!
Demon: But there are infertile people and people who choose not to have children already, and humanity is still expanding over billions of people.
Satan: Yeah well, they suck. I’m doing this with gays this time.
Demon: I don’t get it.
Satan: It’s quite simple; the religious right actually believes that homosexuality will doom nation, ruin marriage, destroy family values, spread disease, have multiple partners, become miserable and suicidal due to being discriminated against, and of course, love each other.
Demon: … I don’t get it. People say the same hateful, crazy, untruthful things about black people or people who are born left handed.
Satan: Well this one will work.
Demon: It’s 2012 right now and homosexuality has done nothing to harm society or marriage or family values. There are gays and lesbians raising children right now and they’re doing fine. They’ve always have been for as long as mankind existed. There are some countries that legalized gay marriage and their country didn’t fall to ruin, and some US states are legalizing gay marriage themselves. As for the diseases, people realize that everyone can get it and that they can prevent it by using protections and learn about what causes it and what you can do to stop it. As for the misery and suicide, it’s only because of hate and discrimination, not because that’s how they are. They can love each other just like any other heterosexual couples.
Satan: … (Bleep)!